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✩ musings

on indecisiveness

June 14, 2013
on indecisiveness

Hi. If you’ve noticed, I changed the layout of my site again. Why? I don’t know. I never know. Most of the time, I just feel like changing it. Do I ever need a reason for doing anything?

This brings up the funny subject of making decisions. I’m horrible at making up my mind, especially for certain things over others. Like, I never know what I want to eat and given multiple choices, it takes me forever to decide which dish I want. When I’m out shopping for anything, I’m the one comparing and contrasting and it takes me hours just to purchase a pair of shoes (this is even worse if I’m shopping online! It takes me days to make up my mind). Going into college, I didn’t know what to major in. Having graduated from college, I still don’t know what to major in, but I defaulted on Creative Writing because I already had the credits for it. When it comes to life and what I want to do with it, I have no idea.

I know some people might find this to be really weird and may not fully understand. I know there are people out there who know what they want and go for it all the time, who just wouldn’t understand the qualms of being undecided. My aunt is one of them. But you have to understand, sometimes it’s difficult to choose when there are just so many options.

Choosing is hard. It’s hard because there are just so many choices. When it comes to what I want to do with my life, I simply don’t know what to pick. I mean, I have an idea of what I’d like to do–I’d like to be an artist, a musician, a writer, a traveler, a filmaker, etc–but I refuse to simply choose one because I want to do all of them and I want to do them all simultaneously. I suppose that’s a bit unrealistic since my attention would be pulled twenty different ways and I’ll never grow at anything and I’ll be a jack-of-all-trade forever, but that’s what I want to do. And sometimes, I don’t want to do any of it.

Is that really so wrong? And why is indecisiveness seen as a negative trait? And on a completely separate note, why should I have a reason to do anything? Are reasons really necessary? Can’t I choose something (or not) just because?

TAGS:my thoughts

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  • Hannah Clare
    June 22, 2013

    YES. I can never decide on anything. I have already enrolled in college, but I’m still not totally decided on attending. Even though I’m pretty sure I’m going to, I just don’t know. So, YES, I get you. And especially on the career path, because I have an entire list of things I would love to do with my life, but I want to do them ALL. I think though, that you can do them all, just doing them to various degrees, if that makes sense. Haha, that’s what I hope to do anyway.

    Reply
  • Tiffany Julia
    June 23, 2013

    no yeah, i do intend to at least try to do them all, despite the fact that tons of adults around me think i should just pick one thing. i feel lost when i focus solely on one thing. i constantly need to be creating something and i like to jump around between art, music and writing. i just need to figure out a way to do them all at once that works and allows me to grow in each medium as well.

    i totally think you should attend college if you can. i personally had a rough transition into it because i didn’t know what i wanted to major in and i was lost focus-wise my first two years. but there are tons of interesting and inspiring classes and i’ve learned that if you come out of class still thinking about all the material and making connections to it in real life without actually intending on doing that, it was totally worth taking even if you were never going to pursue the topic professionally. college is really about searching and experimenting, imo. i still don’t know what i would have majored in if i had not just picked one i had credits for.

    idk, i think society expects us to know what we want to do, but that’s just not the case, especially when they give us so many choices and opportunities to do and be anything we want.

    Reply
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Hi! I'm Tiffany, an art deviant living in New York City. Welcome to my site of life, crafts and love.

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