I just wanted to pop in and share how my December journal is coming along. We’re a little over halfway filled and it’s turning out to look like a very quiet journal—as in not as chunky as I expected. But that could be because my December has been really quiet and low-key. And honestly, I don’t mind it.
I’ve been going through a lot internally, so having this pause has almost forced me to look inward and really access the root cause of my feelings and ultimately explore new ways to deal with them. There’s been a lot of tears as I sit with these little revelations, but I think that’s good. I realized that I have a lot of unresolved issues that I thought I took care of a while ago, but obviously that wasn’t the case. Repressing things is not taking care of them. That’s just storing them away somewhere where they can sit idly until they see the right moment to decimate you in full force. Really dealing with these hard emotions involved sitting with them, accepting them, and learning to react differently when they come up again and again. I’ve been letting fear drive me for a very long time and I’ve learned the hard way that when I react to fear of [insert whatever it is I’m scared of happening], that very thing I’m scared of ends up happening.
So, I’m taking all of this to heart and trying to be as patient as possible while I wait for answers from people who need time and from the universe, to know how to proceed. In the meantime, I’ve been reflecting and setting intentions and buying way too many things. I’ve been playing in my journal when I feel up to it and when I have the time. I’ve been terrible at keeping up with photos, so I hope you enjoy this photo dump of my pages from Days 1 – 19.